sleeping alone


Once you get a taste of sleeping next to someone, sleeping alone in your own bed really sucks.

My eye color

My eye color

Ending of an old relationship.

Me and my husband broke up shortly after my last blog of me being depressed. He stopped caring, he cheated more than once and refuse to be honest even with evidence slapped in his face. I asked if he loved me because he never told me those four letter words at the end of the relationship, instead he threw a fit, screamed, insulted me, shoved me even when I was calm. I grew with rage and started to shove back, he of course upset of me pushing him back grabs my hand, shoves me face into the concrete and shatters my front tooth, leaving me on the streets and than blocking me from contacting him, when I was trying to call for help, you know what he did? he was talking to the girl he liked from Africa on facebook after he shattered my soul, heart and face he had the nerve to leave me in the cold like that. I called the cops on him and we haven’t been together since. He is not a nice person and I don’t care if I blast him on the internet here because it’s the truth. I didn’t blast him on facebook or tell all his friends what he really did to me, I didn’t cause anymore drama than what HE created but his family can keep on pretending like he didn’t do that to me but all he ever did was beat up his younger brother and he even punched his mom in the face as an adult and she tried to warn me..

*sarcasm* nah it’s my fault for ignoring the red signs, his mother kept asking why did I follow him, I should have left him alone, I fucked up his life by calling the cops on him… its my fault for “upsetting” someone who clearly has an anger problem and is mentally fucked up. He didn’t even care when his little sister got molested ( but that’s normal in that house ) in fact he was nice and civil to the molester, I do not understand that… He never wanted to get help from what a man did to him, I am pretty sure that is why he became a sick porn addict who likes looking at teenagers fuck, who steals my female friends private sexual videos off her laptop and tries to lie about it later, who fucks Asian hookers behind his fiance’s back.. oh which by the way there is videos and pictures of you with another girl on the ship and an Asian hooker. 

nah man you a good man, keep being you, I am 100% positive you will find another women who actually loves you. also thanks asshole for shattering my face and lying about it, you must feel real manly about yourself. I don’t care if most people don’t believe me, I have evidence of the abuse and witnesses of your physical abuse from Hawaii, I’m not the one that kept switching up my story to the cops when you hurt my face that day, whats wrong? forgot which lie you came up with? (nothing new) in all honestly I just wanted you to have a long life and die a lonely old man unloved but now that I have someone way better, I just want to shake your hand and say thank you for being a piece of shit to me. I am upset with how I was mistreated and looked like a liar, apology or the truth would have been good enough but all I got was my nerves pulled out of my face.

I see the girl you cheated on me with is now in your life, the irony. She didn’t love you then and she wont now, btw I guess I lied some times too, I’m sorry for all the orgasms and moans I faked, I’m sorry I lied about how awesome and big your dick was when it was actually 4 inches… second thought… I’m not sorry :) kthxbye old chapter

When a man says no in this culture, it’s the end of the discussion. When a woman says no, it’s the beginning of a negotiation.
Gavin De Becker (via lunchwithdahmer)
Healthy things to do when bored at home.

You ever wanted to be constructive but was stuck at home for the day completely bored, no transportation, no money, no work or school? well here is a healthy guide to feeling accomplished in a day even if you can’t take care of everything you want in the moment, take baby steps, refresh your mind and body than proceed to plan out your week.
1. Eat breakfast - It’s the most important meal of the day and should be the only one with the highest calories and should keep you energized. The reason is because we  burn off more calories during the day and our metabolism slows down at night time.
2. Take a shower - Not only does it make you smell nice but it is healthy for your body, leaving your mind refreshed.
3. Work out - I personally like a shower before I work out, I know it doesn’t make any sense but a shower before I workout really improves my work outs. We all know the reasons as to why working out is good but not to just stay healthy its more for mental health as well. Scientific proof that working out will release positive chemicals that help your brain waves to stay more positive. Even when I didn’t accomplish “important” things in that day I always feel accomplished after a work out.
4. Snack -  A snack after a work out re-energizes you and protein is always good for your muscles after a work out, your body will heal faster and you wont feel as sore or at all.
5. Read - 15 minutes a day of reading is good to keep your brain active. Read anything, comics, books, manga, news and magazines.
6. Video games or puzzles - Many testing and documents have proven to increase the intelligence of a person who plays video games or puzzles on a daily basis, I am not saying do this all day or for long periods of time but its not only fun it improves quick thinking is sticky situations.
7. Lunch - After a break of down time, make something healthy to eat, be creative.
8. Plan out your week on a calender - When you sit down to plan out your week you become more organized and less forgetful. I know I forget to take care of my things all the time so I need it down on paper/electronic devices where you can start trying to take care of important things day by day.
9. Learn one new fact a day. -  This can be done by reading 15 min a day or watching a youtube video online. When you learn something you can share it with other people,  when you are able to come up with your own topics people start to respect you more as a person.
10. Watch a show - I personally don’t like to watch much tv but I always get caught into some shows or discovery channel. It’s my down time and I actually learn a lot about the earth when I set it on a health channel, Discovery, Animal planet, anything that educates you keeps you open minded and gives you topics to talk about with other people.
 11. Make something creative for someone. - People love thoughtful gifts, no matter who you are, they might not always appreciate them and toss them to the side but it generally never fails to make someone smile, people like to know they are thought of especially the ones we are close to.
12. Write letters to friends and family. - You need strong bonding time with those around you, let me break it down as to why it’s important to show that you care about others. When you lose everything, who do you think will be there for you? when you’re homeless or at your lowest times we all need someone to be there to lift us up, it’s a circle of life and it’s ok to lean on those who are there for you till you get back up on your feet. Try to be there more for others and they will be there for you.
13. Take a picture - I love looking back at how far I came, I have a box called “box of memories” with all my letters, thoughtful gifts and pictures. Some day when you’re old you’ll have stories and proof to tell. Always keep proof you might need it someday. Pictures help out in so many ways in today society not just taking pictures of ourselves but of anything important or a memory we might just forget someday.
14. Learn a talent or practice on one. - I am not a very talented person but I have been working on my singing a little every day. I think its impersonally important to try and improve ourselves even if it’s a little a day. Talents are also great conversation starters.
15. Take a evening walk listening to music by yourself/with someone/walking dog. - I use to take sunset walks by myself all the time, I imagine is better with someone else or a pet that you love. You need some bonding time, with yourself, person or animal. It’s nice to just enjoy the earth and try to appreciate it for what it’s worth. Try to care about your planet a little more, maybe read up on it. Make sure you throw your trash away, take pictures of nature… because it all might be gone some day.

The Repeat

self esteem slowly being smashed away again.  =[


The Tumblr Guide to Healthy Livinga compilation of resources to help you eat right, exercise, and be happy!How to Start a Healthier Lifestyle
Nutrition Eating Clean PrinciplesNon-Dieters DietYour Flat Belly Day 1 meal plan by Women’s Health MagazineYour Flat Belly Day 2 meal plan by Women’s Health MagazineYour Flat Belly Day 2 Meal Plan by Women’s Health MagazineEating Low CarbWhat is PaleoPortion Size GuideGet lean grocery list80 Healthiest Foods100 Foods that Dr.Oz wants on your Shopping ListShirataki NoodlesTips to Snack Better10-Calorie Sweet and Crunch SnacksWhy Eat Raw Foods?10 Commandments of DietingTips for Staying Healthy in SchoolThe Happier way to Diet MenuFood that makes You PrettierLook Better Naked One Week Meal Plan Part 1Look Better Naked One Week Meal Plan Part 2PortionsDr.Poon DietThe Best New Superfoods12 Best Foods for your AbsClear Skin DietFoods that Melt Flab AwayRaw Food for the Rest of UsQuick Combos5 Ingredient Eating Clean RecipesHerbs that HealWhat to Eat When You’re Craving…Eating Clean vs. Junk examplesTransition to Healthy LivingEating Clean Video
RecipesEating Clean RecipesHealthy Meal Ideas for Breakfast, Lunch & DinnerBefore and After Workout Snack IdeasSuper 8-Step Salad WrapsNot-Quite-Unnecessary Raving about Broccoli SlawGrocery ListFoods that Cause BloatingEat Breakfast, Here’s WhyMaking Conscious Health Choices: Who Decides?Not eating enough…but not hungry either?Sunshine Oatmeal RecipeOatmeal from The Pea PodChocolate Oatmeal Cookie-In-A-BowlAn Overwhelming Amount of Oatmeal RecipesMore RecipesStarbucks Drinks Under 200 CaloriesSnack AttackSmoothies
Healthy DessertsHealthy Dessert BlogBanana BitesGrapefruit & Strawberry Popsicles (make them without alcohol)Peanut Butter & Banana SandwichesFrozen Yogurt BlackberriesSkinny Coconut CupcakeNutella Fudge PopsBanana Split Cheesecake BitesFrozen Fruit PopsWatermelon TartHealthy Banana Almond Chocolate Ice CreamBanana Split Cheesecake BitesFruit Ice CubesBanana Ice CreamFrozen Yogurt StrawberriesPeanut Butter Chocolate Ice CreamMore Frozen Banana BitesApple CupcakesRaw Tropical Ice CreamCucumber Melon PopsiclesChocolate Covered BananasJello SkiesApple Peanut Butter SlicesFrozen Banana PopsiclesBanana Berry Soft ServeVolume Ice Cream
Cleanse/Detox3 Day DetoxThe Look Better Naked 2 Day CleanseJillian Michaels DetoxDetox RecipesDetox EssentialsLean Green SmoothieDetox Smoothie
Veganism/Vegetarianism Free Vegetarian Starter Kit by PetaVegetarian 101Making the TransitionRecipes by PetaShopping guide by PetaEasy Sweet Potato Veggie Burgers with AvocadoShirataki NoodlesOnehappyveganVeganYumYumTheVeganStoner
Weight LossHow to Determine Your Ideal WeightHow to Overcome A PlateauBeat a Weight Loss PlateauWhy You Aren’t Losing WeightHow to Burn Fat FastestMetabolism Boosters5 Metabolism BoostersHow to Conquer Cravings20 Secrets of Very Fit PeopleFighting Belly FatHow Do I Lose WeightThinking of Giving Up?The 2 Minute VisualizationHow to Keep Yourself Full for LongerLose Weight without DietingFlat Tummy TipsCommit to Fit10 Ways to Get Your Diet Back On TrackConstructing A Plan
CalculatorsBody Type/Frame Size CalculatorCalorie CalculatorIdeal Weight CalculatorHow Much Weight You Can Lose By Prom/Summer/Your Wedding/This Thursday/Tonight
EBooksWinning by Losing - Jillian Michaels 
ExerciseLift Weights to Help You Lose WeightHow to Start Running [Couch to 5k]How to Tone Any Area of Your BodyBuilding Lean Muscle vs. Bulky MuscleBut I Don’t Want to Get Bulky!Abdominal Exercises for BeginnersRunning for Weight LossGym Cheat SheetThe Lazy Girl’s Guide to Interval TrainingArchive of Online Work OutsTop 30 Free YouTube Work Out Channels100 Best Workout SongsWorkout BasicsInsanity Workout Videos and CalenderTone Every InchTop 10 Calorie Burning CardioMore Links to Online WorkoutsWorkout FinderVictoria Secret Angel’s Workouts30 Day Shred Printable Chart and VideosBodyRock inspired WorkoutsYoga: The Basics and How to Get Started77 Reasons To Do YogaYouTube Yoga for BeginnersYouTube Yoga RoutineYouTube by Body PartBye Bye Arm JiggleThe Workout MovesLunge 101Lean Thighs - No LungesTarget WorkoutsYes, You Can Yoga!

MindFeeling good10 Ways to be HappyHow to be ConfidentGandhi’s Top 10 FundamentalsFocusHappiness Manifesto3 Simple Rules in LifeZen Flow ChartKarma Cleanse
 A great fitspo run by a guy.
You Don’t Have to Be a Size 0 to Be BeautifulFine BauerMaryChristina HendricksLexi PlacourakisKasia PilewiczMore beautiful girls
Battling Eating DisordersThe Minnesota Starvation StudyWhy Starving Seems to Work Stop the ED HateHow Bulimia Affects Your Body“The Binge” and Why You Should Eat When You’re HungryWhat to do After a Binge by MatchStickMollyWhat is Intuitive Eating?After a BingeTips to Control BingingHelp with Eating DisordersNational Eating Disorders Dealing with Eating DisordersNational Center for Eating Disorders UK
Inspirationpeople that have changed their lives and have lost a ton of weight! soldiering-ontillicanseemylovelybonesfuneralformyfatroserevitalizedanotherdreamanotherlovepeacefulserenityxhealthylifemore inspirationand some morejessicablossominghopetogether-staytogether130 lbs Lost!amazing transformationtheysayanythingispossiblea tumblr dedicated to before and aftersnoexcusesgetfitnow88jazzie-onamission



The Tumblr Guide to Healthy Living
a compilation of resources to help you eat right, exercise, and be happy!
How to Start a Healthier Lifestyle

Eating Clean Principles
Non-Dieters Diet
Your Flat Belly Day 1 meal plan by Women’s Health Magazine
Your Flat Belly Day 2 meal plan by Women’s Health Magazine
Your Flat Belly Day 2 Meal Plan by Women’s Health Magazine
Eating Low Carb
What is Paleo
Portion Size Guide
Get lean grocery list
80 Healthiest Foods
100 Foods that Dr.Oz wants on your Shopping List
Shirataki Noodles
Tips to Snack Better
10-Calorie Sweet and Crunch Snacks
Why Eat Raw Foods?
10 Commandments of Dieting
Tips for Staying Healthy in School
The Happier way to Diet Menu
Food that makes You Prettier
Look Better Naked One Week Meal Plan Part 1
Look Better Naked One Week Meal Plan Part 2
Dr.Poon Diet
The Best New Superfoods
12 Best Foods for your Abs
Clear Skin Diet
Foods that Melt Flab Away
Raw Food for the Rest of Us
Quick Combos
5 Ingredient Eating Clean Recipes
Herbs that Heal
What to Eat When You’re Craving…
Eating Clean vs. Junk examples
Transition to Healthy Living
Eating Clean Video

Eating Clean Recipes
Healthy Meal Ideas for Breakfast, Lunch & DinnerBefore and After Workout Snack Ideas
Super 8-Step Salad Wraps
Not-Quite-Unnecessary Raving about Broccoli Slaw
Grocery List
Foods that Cause Bloating
Eat Breakfast, Here’s Why
Making Conscious Health Choices: Who Decides?
Not eating enough…but not hungry either?
Sunshine Oatmeal Recipe
Oatmeal from The Pea Pod
Chocolate Oatmeal Cookie-In-A-Bowl
An Overwhelming Amount of Oatmeal Recipes
More Recipes
Starbucks Drinks Under 200 Calories
Snack Attack

Healthy Desserts
Healthy Dessert Blog
Banana Bites
Grapefruit & Strawberry Popsicles (make them without alcohol)
Peanut Butter & Banana Sandwiches
Frozen Yogurt Blackberries
Skinny Coconut Cupcake
Nutella Fudge Pops
Banana Split Cheesecake Bites
Frozen Fruit Pops
Watermelon Tart
Healthy Banana Almond Chocolate Ice Cream
Banana Split Cheesecake Bites
Fruit Ice Cubes
Banana Ice Cream
Frozen Yogurt Strawberries
Peanut Butter Chocolate Ice Cream
More Frozen Banana Bites
Apple Cupcakes
Raw Tropical Ice Cream
Cucumber Melon Popsicles
Chocolate Covered Bananas
Jello Skies
Apple Peanut Butter Slices
Frozen Banana Popsicles
Banana Berry Soft Serve
Volume Ice Cream

3 Day Detox
The Look Better Naked 2 Day Cleanse
Jillian Michaels Detox
Detox Recipes
Detox Essentials
Lean Green Smoothie
Detox Smoothie

Free Vegetarian Starter Kit by Peta
Vegetarian 101
Making the Transition
Recipes by Peta
Shopping guide by Peta
Easy Sweet Potato Veggie Burgers with Avocado
Shirataki Noodles

Weight Loss
How to Determine Your Ideal Weight
How to Overcome A Plateau
Beat a Weight Loss Plateau
Why You Aren’t Losing Weight
How to Burn Fat Fastest
Metabolism Boosters
5 Metabolism Boosters
How to Conquer Cravings
20 Secrets of Very Fit People
Fighting Belly Fat
How Do I Lose Weight
Thinking of Giving Up?
The 2 Minute Visualization
How to Keep Yourself Full for Longer
Lose Weight without Dieting
Flat Tummy Tips
Commit to Fit
10 Ways to Get Your Diet Back On Track
Constructing A Plan

Body Type/Frame Size Calculator
Calorie Calculator
Ideal Weight Calculator
How Much Weight You Can Lose By Prom/Summer/Your Wedding/This Thursday/Tonight

Winning by Losing - Jillian Michaels 

Lift Weights to Help You Lose Weight
How to Start Running [Couch to 5k]
How to Tone Any Area of Your Body
Building Lean Muscle vs. Bulky Muscle
But I Don’t Want to Get Bulky!
Abdominal Exercises for Beginners
Running for Weight Loss
Gym Cheat Sheet
The Lazy Girl’s Guide to Interval Training
Archive of Online Work Outs
Top 30 Free YouTube Work Out Channels
100 Best Workout Songs
Workout Basics
Insanity Workout Videos and Calender
Tone Every Inch
Top 10 Calorie Burning Cardio
More Links to Online Workouts
Workout Finder
Victoria Secret Angel’s Workouts
30 Day Shred Printable Chart and Videos
BodyRock inspired Workouts
Yoga: The Basics and How to Get Started
77 Reasons To Do Yoga
YouTube Yoga for Beginners
YouTube Yoga Routine
YouTube by Body Part
Bye Bye Arm Jiggle
The Workout MovesLunge 101
Lean Thighs - No Lunges
Target Workouts
Yes, You Can Yoga!

Feeling good
10 Ways to be Happy
How to be Confident
Gandhi’s Top 10 Fundamentals
Happiness Manifesto
3 Simple Rules in Life
Zen Flow Chart
Karma Cleanse

 A great fitspo run by a guy.


You Don’t Have to Be a Size 0 to Be Beautiful
Fine Bauer
Christina Hendricks
Lexi Placourakis
Kasia Pilewicz
More beautiful girls

Battling Eating Disorders
The Minnesota Starvation Study
Why Starving Seems to Work 
Stop the ED Hate
How Bulimia Affects Your Body
“The Binge” and Why You Should Eat When You’re Hungry
What to do After a Binge by MatchStickMolly
What is Intuitive Eating?
After a Binge
Tips to Control Binging
Help with Eating Disorders
National Eating Disorders 
Dealing with Eating Disorders
National Center for Eating Disorders UK

people that have changed their lives and have lost a ton of weight! 
more inspiration
and some more
130 lbs Lost!
amazing transformation
a tumblr dedicated to before and afters